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First post, 4 days into the program!

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  • First post, 4 days into the program!

    Hi everybody,

    After lurking, I've decided to register so I can post with you, and get a high-five or a kick in the arse as needed.

    I am currently 4 days into PL, after a steady weight gain the past 10 years, I'm 36. Somehow, upon turning 25 my body went haywire. Out of the blue I began getting acne. Periods that were bad became intolerable with pain, serious depression (which runs in my family anyways) reared it's ugly head. Each day became a lesson in living with stress that wore me down to a nub. Then I did low-carb, dropped 40 pounds and things got much, much better.

    However the flip side of getting better is the feeling that you are now in control and have "beaten" whatever was wrong, so you slowly begin to eat a bit of bread here & there, which turns into baked potatoes, which turns into a slice of cake every other day and bingo! You are back where you started!

    Except the past 8 years I have now put on much more weight- so much more I do not even dream of stepping on a scale to see what it says. I would guess it's about 205. Going on and off anti-depressants has not helped, each time I started a new course, cue the insatiable eating, lousy sex drive, more eating to combat feeling so crappy about myself, and then throw in some fertility drugs for good measure. I've never been so ashamed of myself or my appearance. I am a tall girl, I've worked as a model, I used to turn heads when I walked into a room. Now, I am invisible. I am embarassed to dress up & go out: nothing fits, and I leave the house feeling worse than I started. When I think about the last 10 years of my life, I see how limited and small my world has become. And enough is enough!

    I don't want to waste the last years of my 30's feeling or behaving the way I have, up till now. I want to enjoy getting dressed up again, for my husband to be proud to have me on his arm, to fit the Dolce & Gabbana dress I bought 4 years ago as a "reward" for myself, but have never worn. I don't want to mysteriously slink out of the room each time somebody pulls out a camera. This summer I want to wear all the beautiful sundresses that have sat in my closet, probably being eaten by moths.

    PL just makes sense to me. Grains are not my friend. Intellectually I know this- I know that I get blazing sinus headaches & a permanent runny nose, and a bloated gut that makes me look 6 months pregnant! I'm here to break the habit and to change my life.

  • #2
    Welcome! Best of luck in getting healthy - you won't regret it.


    • #3
      Welcome to the Tribe - High Five!
      There are two wolves fighting within a man's heart, one is Love, the other is Hate. The one that wins is the one you feed.

      My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we'll change the world. - Jack Layton

      The Primal Adventures of Griffin - Huzzah!


      • #4
        With patience, strength, and the feeling that you know the rest of us are here to support you(and kick your arse;-), hope those sundresses knock em dead:-) Free your Mind, and your Grok will follow...Welcome
        Free your mind, and your Grok will follow!


        • #5
          Good luck!

          Also....just curious - have you been diagnosed PCOS?


          • #6
            You are in the right place! It sounds like your hormones went seriously out of whack. The good thing is eating clean will help to bring those back into balance.
            There's a crack inside of everything, that's how the light gets in. ~Leonard Cohen
            Journal, From Sick to Fit: