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Primal Journal - Siobhan

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  • Siobhan
    started a topic Primal Journal - Siobhan

    Primal Journal - Siobhan

    I went Primal because of my cat. And my neighborís goat. Donít forget the goat.

    Let me introduce myself. I am a 52-year female facing the normal life challenges. I have a very stressful job. I work nights. I have just entered menopause. I have minor, nagging problems Ė intermittent lower back pain, mild acne that just wonít resolve, acid reflux that can wake me up. For the last few months I have been trying very hard to change things for the better. My weight will not budge on CW eating. I have spent thousands fighting the acne. The doctor gave me pills for the reflux, which I never took. Careful yoga and core work donít help the back pain.

    The thing is, I used to be really attractive. Until 7 or 8 years ago I was slim and relatively fit. I looked many years younger that my actual age. These were genetic gifts that I did not take for granted. But time marches on, my life changed, and so has my appearance and the way I feel.

    It was Easter Sunday and I was eating dinner with my cat. I have two cats, both rescued. One is a very large black cat with striking tiger markings on his face. He is very slim and powerful looking. He eats only canned cat food and small amounts of grass that I provide. He wonít even look at people food. The other is a much smaller and very chubby black and white house lion. He will eat ANYTHING. Now this is a bit embarrassing. I live alone Ė which I love Ė but it is nice to share a meal with another creature sometimes. So I am sitting at my kitchen table with a piece of pizza. Black and white house lion is sitting on the table with a piece of pizza. He will consume an entire piece as long as I tear it into manageable bites. So here I am, eating pizza with my cat. I looked at him and suddenly it occurred to me that I am poisoning my cat. I am feeding him poison.

    I threw the pizza away, to his great dismay. My eyes fell upon a cupcake I had brought home from church that morning. It was a really cute concoction, with a coconut birdís nest on the top. I grabbed it and went outside, where my neighborís goats were grazing near the fence. I normally feed them carrots, celery, and lettuce trimmings, which they adore, so they readily came to me. I pushed the cupcake through the fence and one of the goats took it in his mouth.

    Then he spit it out onto the ground. He looked at me with an expression that could only be described as incredulous. You might not think a goat has different facial expressions, but trust me, they do. If he could talk, he would have said, ďDo you expect me to eat that crap?Ē

    Here I was, having a second epiphany in as many minutes. A GOAT has more sense about proper diet than I do. If that isnít a sobering thought, nothing is.

    I went back in the house and fired off an email to an internet friend of mine. She has mentioned in passing that she eats no grains, legumes, or beans but I never paid much attention. She happened to be online and got right back to me, directing me to Markís Daily Apple. It was like coming home. So many thoughts and ideas I have had brewing around in my head all laid out and validated. Even though a tubby out-of-shape woman doesnít have much in common with a caveman on the surface, genetically we have lots in common.

    I started right away. I had plenty of meat, fruit, and veg in the house. Instead of pizza I had a large bowl of leafy greens with olive oil and balsamic vinegar with some chicken and a pear. I didnít skimp on the oil, and went to sleep many hours later without a hunger pain.

    I have spent many hours over the last three days reading the website and reading the ebooks. Imagine how much fun I had devising a workout! See, I work the night shift in a small rural hospital. I can run up the stairs and down the halls (non-patient areas of course!) Since I am on the team that responds to emergencies anywhere in the hospital at any time, I love the idea that this will actually help me respond more quickly and in better shape. The last time I had to run up three flights of stairs to rescusitate a baby, let me tell you, it wasnít pretty. (The baby did great, though.) I have plenty of space and privacy to do whatever I want, and since Iím wearing scrubs, itís not a problem to bang out some squats, pushups, etc. I am embarrassed to admit I canít even do one pullup. Iím trying.

    So here I am after only three days feeling great. I canít believe the change already. I am sleeping better Ė a lot better Ė and this is really significant because as a night shift worker, day sleeping is always problematic. And my skin Ė I am astounded at the improvement this quickly. I would have thought any change would take several weeks, but the zits are gone and my skin tone is even. Two people asked me if I have been on vacation lately. (Sadly, no. Maybe now I will have enough energy to plan some fun.)

    I feel a bit foolish posting here as I am so new to this but I think that community support is really important when making changes and you can bet there arenít any Groks around here. I havenít been this excited about anything for a long time, and at the same time I feel really positive and motivated to make real and lasting change. Thanks for reading this - Siobhan

  • Coll
    replied
    Hi old journal!

    Leave a comment:


  • The Walrus
    replied
    Bringing up this old journal.

    Leave a comment:


  • Wendy717
    replied
    Yours is my favorite journal! I hope you don't have to leave... I would feel a bit more lonely in the world...

    Leave a comment:


  • jacmac
    replied
    Originally posted by perennialpam View Post
    I'm a regular reader who also would miss your posts, exploits and hearing about you. Please PM me too.

    Actually, how do you PM people?
    ditto!

    Leave a comment:


  • perennialpam
    replied
    I'm a regular reader who also would miss your posts, exploits and hearing about you. Please PM me too.

    Actually, how do you PM people?

    Leave a comment:


  • ragwort
    replied
    Ooooooh| All horrid stuff. I don,t post much either but soooo look forward to your journal. Maybe you could PM your regulars to let us know where you are??? I would miss this erudite and irreverent correspondence.

    Leave a comment:


  • tomi
    replied
    I'll be looking for you................ (ok, that sounds stalkishly creepy)

    Leave a comment:


  • JoanieL
    replied
    I hope you'll continue your journal. I may not post here that often, but I read you every day.

    A romantic intubation is great start!

    Leave a comment:


  • RittenRemedy
    replied
    That is super creepy... I've got some pretty bad people in my past who I would be HORRIFIED if they found my journal or anything else about me anywhere ever. So I totally understand your fears and wanting to shit down this journal, but we would miss you! Especially if Ex or anyone else can clearly see she's one troubled person, don't let her force you to stop something you enjoy!

    Leave a comment:


  • Coll
    replied
    Siobhan, I am sorry about the 'friend' who is making things so weird! Let us know via PM if you move on so we don't lose touch!!! That would be too sad I like the sound of G - e-mail address is good! A smooth procedure together is nice - intubations can be pretty tricky sometimes and having someone with you that is an old hat - cool!

    Leave a comment:


  • Siobhan
    replied
    I haven't had actual contact with her, Ex has told me. She has sent him some stuff from my journal here. She found the pic I posted of him at Acadia. I have no idea how she found this. I think he was annoyed with me at first, but then he realized the online stalking thing is creepy and I think he has transferred the annoyance to her. Also I didn't do anything wrong, which he also realizes. The initial ickiness has worn off and now I feel sorry for her. Also would caution her against this sort of thing, it tends to backfire.

    However, the time is ripe for making some changes and this journal is getting awfully unwieldy. You'll find me.

    Good news on the G front. Minor but good. I came into work tonight and there he was! He got called in to fill in for a sick call. I told him I had sent him a text. Guess what? He doesn't have texting on his phone! That would explain why he didn't answer mine. But he very quickly gave me his email. There was a situation going on when I arrived and we did an intubation together (so romantic!) I'm used to having to work by myself, it was so great to have another experienced and capable RT there.

    Leave a comment:


  • tomi
    replied
    ^ again, Marcadav nails it on the head! So I will just add ................ ditto!

    Leave a comment:


  • marcadav
    replied
    How did she learn about you? From the Ex?

    It seems to me that if she is a "friend" of the Ex, rather than a friend, then it stands to reason that she may be jealous or feel threatened by your relationship with the Ex. If this is the case, I think it is the Ex's responsibility to get this person to stay out of your business.

    I will tell you what my attorney told me when my ex's girlfriend kept calling me. He told me to tell her,
    "Stop calling me. If you call me again I will take legal action based on harassment." The calls stopped.

    As creepy as all this is, I would not give this woman the power that leads you to change living your life the way you want to. I would also question your Ex's behavior and motive.

    Leave a comment:


  • Sabine
    replied
    I have no advice, but I would hate to lose you from the forum. It must feel creepy, that someone sought out this journal because they know(of) you, and not from similar interests, but it seems to me that there is nothing here that you wouldn't tell someone if they asked nicely. You are such a frank person. So, unless she is doing something else that seems dangerous, I would just put it out of your mind. (Oops, advice!) Maybe she just though you sounded cool from Ex's mention of you(because, you know, you are), and wanted to know more(who wouldn't) without walking up to you(a little intimidating in our society).

    Leave a comment:

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