No announcement yet.

Primal Journal: NZ Suse

  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • suze,

    I feel for you. you just keep your head above water as you go through this crazy family drama stuff over the holidays no less, and then you know, update when you can.


    • Merry Christmas to you, Suze, both you and your fireman, whatever may be going on in your life. I hope some of the family drama has eased for the holidays.

      My musings

      The old stuff


      • hi everyone, i've been meaning to come and update but it has really been too hard. I've lost 3 kgs just from stress and not eating so I guess there is an upside eh???

        so the brothers, well they are dead to me. I admitted my mother to a resthome on christmas eve. It honestly made no difference to mum as her dementia is so far gone, she has no idea what day is what. My brothers arrived at the rest home, where I had an order in place that Mum could not be removed without my written authority. Kicked up merry hell. I called the police and they were trespassed - not by me, but by the rest home management as they were asked to take it outside or leave and they refused and sat in the reception area behaving in an intimidating manner. So really they couldnt be any stupider. I hate them. Yes really I do. And no, I will NEVER EVER forgive them. My sister arrived on boxing day and we arranged for us to take mum over to my elder brother's place so they could both see her. We said we would arrive at 4pmish to 6pmish. The elder one, who is the one behind the legal action, arrived at 4.30pm having been out for a run, and then went out at 5pm to pick up his daughter from work and do the grocery shopping. What the Fuck. He is a nutter. Seemed shocked when at 6pm we said we had to go. Of course I have completely forgotten to mention that one of the brothers threatened to punch me out a couple of weeks ago and I had to call the police on him. What an arse. But I dont scare easily. Everything they have done is being documented and if we do end up in court, I feel confident that any sane judge will throw it out. The gravy train is coming to an end boys, you'll have to move out of the comfy homes you've been living in and paying nothing for and get a real life.

        anyway, my christmas day comprised of eating one christmas mince pie. I spent it at a rest home in Tauranga (which I didnt mind) and then I booked into a hotel for the evening as I just couldnt bring myself to stay at mum's house with my brother, the one that lives there (and the other brother that lives in the house immediately behind).

        The fireman has been completely awesome through all of this. I also have a fabulous lawyer. The whole thing is completely ridiculous, but I am happy to say that my mum is now safe and secure and being cared for properly. I'm at home at the moment while my sister is in Tauranga doing daily visiting duty while mum settles in. I will go back down in a few days. The nursing staff at the rest home are fabulous. Mum is settling in ok, although she cant remember where her room is at the moment, but that is not abnormal in any way.

        anyway, it is nearly a new year. I know that I need to get back to being healthy. Stress, and bad food choices, sugary stuff, is not good. I probably have lots of inflammation going on in my body. My digestive system feels unhappy but at least I know what i have to do.

        I hope everyone has had a great christmas and that we all have a happy new year. As i said before, i've been checking in on the journals from time to time, but just havent had the energy to make any sort of comments. I'm going to change that in the new year. I'll probably start boring you all with talk of my wedding or something


        • Originally posted by Suse View Post
          hi everyone, i've been meaning to come and update but it has really been too hard. I've lost 3 kgs just from stress and not eating so I guess there is an upside eh???
          "Always look on the bright side of life"

          It sucks that you've had to go through that
          I'm glad that your mom doesn't know what's happening.
          We've missed you

          Originally posted by Suse View Post
          I'll probably start boring you all with talk of my wedding or something
          Wait! What???
          "Be careful what you pretend to be because you are what you pretend to be." Kurt Vonnegut
          "I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by." Douglas Adams
          "Moderation sucks." Suse
          "Wine is a vegetable." Meaty
          "Every decision you make, from what you eat to what you do with your time tonight, turns you into who you are tomorrow and the day after that." Cmdr Chris Hadfield



          • yes remember, engaged in Paris!!!


            • right, about time I posted about the more humdrum daily existence stuff.

              yesterday we fired up our new bbq and had friends and family over for lunch. Did a lovely piece of eye fillet steak, seasoned, seared on bbq, then put on a seeded mustard and garlic smear and back into bbq on a rack with hood down for 20 mins. Meat came out absolutely perfect medium rare and was delicious. I made a capsicum, tomato, cucumber salsa and a semi caesar salad and we had some plain boiled potatoes. I think I can safely say that passed the primal test. The lashings of bubbly maybe not so much primal Oh and the christmas pudding with custard and cream. Well I had to have a christmas pudding seeing as I missed out on christmas lunch. Man it was good too.

              Then we went out for dinner in the evening with friends where I proceeded to drink even more bubbly. Lordy,, I was super tired last night. That was the most I have drunk in months yesterday. probably really good to have a blow out though.

              We didnt get to sit on our new outdoor furniture though, it was just too hot outside yesterday and the fireman hadnt set up the umbrella base on our deck.


              • Dinner sounds lovely. I can dream of too hot, only another 6 or 7 months and maybe I'll have the same sentiment. Although I rarely find it too hot.

                Happy New Year to you, I'll raise a glass of bubbles in frosty air in the hot tub in your honour .
                My musings

                The old stuff


                • happy new year to you all. My NY eve was very quiet, in fact I hate to admit it but I was in bed fast asleep at 10pm. Tragic. I am on some come down from stress I think. Have been having terrible nausea for last few days (in the mornings no less) and just feel sleepy all the time at the mo.

                  Went and looked at a few wedding venues yesterday. No closer to deciding on a date or a venue


                  • Back down at the beach again for a few days to check up on mum in the rest home. Had a healthy dinner of steak and salad, with a not so healthy half bottle of wine... although it was the low alcohol wine! Nice walk on the beach with the pooches too. No nausea today but did have an incredible sleepiness come over me at the rest home so while mum had a wee nap on her bed, I lay on the sofa and had one too


                    • definitely feeling a bit better. No nausea or sleepiness today. Perhaps a virus. havent eaten much today though. Was going to repeat last nights dinner but things went awry and I all I managed was drinking wine instead Had a few potato chips and cheese on crackers. so tonights dinner (steak cooked already) will be a cold lunch instead.


                      • I feel like i am getting nothing done at the moment but meh, who cares. I did have a super big walk on the beach with the doggies this morning, and then I took them over to the rest home to see mum. I'm turning them into therapy dogs, lots of the oldies love them and want to pat them and chat. Nice. Had starr up on mum's lap and leo just lay on the floor and whinged for an hour.

                        Went home for some lunch - as promised I had my steak and salad for lunch, washed down with a coke and then a handful of chocolates? hmmmm oh well. Bit of time out on the deck in my bikini which was nice. Then back to pick up mum and take her to the hairdresser. While she was there, I took all the dogs (including mums) for a short walk round the block. Judy, Mum's dog, is old and deaf and blind and probably as demented as mum So a slow walk. Then picked up mum and took her back to the rest home in time for her dinner. The staff at the rest home are lovely.

                        Apparently my dumbarse brother rang the rest home today complaining about me moving the table by the door in mums room, he's concerned she'll go outside into the garden and have a fall. I have no idea what planet he is on as I have moved nothing... if he is going to make stupid accusations, at least get them right. At least I dont have to speak to him. If I do need to communicate with him, I just leave him a note. I know, so grown up, but really,, if you met him, you would understand.

                        Tonight I had a lazy fish and chips for dinner washed down with a beer and then a glass of wine and watched The Graham Norton Show,, he always makes me laugh.

                        And that is my day....

                        Tomorrow I am meeting an old school friend for brunch. Havent seen her for 35 years or so....


                        • yay I'm back home again. but ugh, I have a splitting headache which is wine induced.... was over at the neighbours telling her the whole sorry saga re mum and the dumbos. Clearly it wasnt my new favourite low alcohol wine. Must get some more of that, (although at the moment I dont feel like having wine ever again - no doubt that will change by 5pm )

                          I need to try and get into some good habits this year, proper and regular exercise would be a good thing. I need to capitalise on the stress induced weight loss and get this flabby tummy into shape. Planks obviously would be a good start.

                          I am going to treat myself to a half day spa treatment later this week I think. facial, massage, etc. I think I can say in all honesty that I deserve it. the place I like to go to has a lovely pool, gym, steam room, sauna so I can get there early and have a steam to really get out all the toxins in my body.

                          I have a few jobs on my list for today, but one thing i must do is wash and vacuuum my car. It is filthy and I cant stand it a minute longer. One more week of unemployment so I had better get my act together and start clearing jobs off the list - especially now that I am back home.


                          • well I had my spa treatment and it was heavenly. I love that feeling as you drift in and out of consciousness when having the treatment. I came away feeling like a million bucks.

                            I also cleaned my car so good that the jobs are getting done. I need to do it again tomorrow as I did a drive to Tauranga today to see Mum so needless to say it is covered in dead bugs Mum was very down in the dumps when I arrived, but I took her back to her room and gave her a hand massage and suggested she have a nap which she did while I sat there and read a magazine. After she had some lunch she had perked up considerably so I took her out for coffee and cake Nice, it made me feel good to come home knowing she was in a happier frame of mind. Good days, bad days I guess.

                            Its the middle of the night and I'm listening to the fireman snoring in the next room... My god it is bad tonight. Not long now till his operation so hopefully this will be a thing of the past.

                            Last day of freedom tomorrow and then work. i think I should make it an alcohol free day.


                            • Hi Suse, I have only recently discovered your journal and have been reading it so I thought I would stop in and say hello. I really admire how you are handling your mum and your family situation.

                              I used to travel to NZ regularly when I was a flight attendant. I loved it there and it is the one place I really, really miss. In fact thinking about it just now makes me a little 'homesick' although obviously it was not my home.
                              My Primal Journal:

                              "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold


                              • Suze - thinking of you, enjoy this last day of relaxation !!!!!
                                G x
                                "never let the truth get in the way of a good story "

                                ...small steps....